Some of you may remember that I had a pretty big freak out during H's open enrollment last November. H has been at his current gig for over 15 years and is not eligible for any more raises as he is "topped out." We didn't mind so much, because our biggest expenses were rent and my medical stuff. BCBS is supposed to be like winning the lottery of insurances.
BCBS used to offer us a decent plan. As long as a doc confirmed that I "really needed" something, I got it. That's how I finally got the mental, emotional, and medical help I needed. It's how I learned about my ulcers, my kidney-stones, and my random internal bleeding. It's also how I finally got the sleep study and CPAP I'd clearly needed since childhood.
I have memories of being 5 or 6 years old and not even being able to run for the school bus. I was tired my whole life. Because I was in the midst of such a warm wonderful family (sarcasm, dammit) I was constantly told I was "just lazy." I grew up thinking everyone felt like me, shitty and tired, but they pulled themselves out of it--and I didn't because I was SO lazy. When our appalling eating habits also made me fat, and that fat was then exacerbated by nearly a decade in the fast food industry--my body, and my credit were both pretty much ruined by the time I was 25. Yeah, there's more to that...but I digress.
It wasn't until I met H, and introduced a steady stream of love and support (and okay, income--not a lot of money, but I wasn't at risk of homelessness anymore) into life that it got any better. Having health insurance was a fucking godsend. Finally finding a doctor who didn't dismiss my rampant night terrors and hallucinations as "probably from smoking marijuana" (or saying it's brain damage and then not doing anything about it) and got me a damn sleep study. Turns out, I was damn near insane from lack of sleep, as I stopped breathing at least 80 times an hour.
I have the kind of apena that is hereditary. I've always had it, as has much of my family. Losing 200 pounds wouldn't make it go away. Even if it did, I'll probably need a good night's sleep before that happens. I've lost a bunch of weight since I got the CPAP, just because I'm awake and have energy.
Anyway, H's work used to offer 3 tiers of insurance: basic, medium, and fancy-pants. We couldn't afford the fancy-pants, but needed more than the basic.
They used to offer 3 plans: employee, employee plus spouse, and family.
We have no kids, so our choice was obvious.
FF to last year. They cancelled the medium plan, and canceled employee plus spouse. I worried that we'd have to cancel cable/internet/and one of our phones, which I didn't like, just to keep the insurance. I need the internet and cable to work. Turns out, that still wouldn't have been enough scrimping. We'd have needed to find a cheaper apartment, which would have meant an even worse neighborhood and MUCH farther for H to commute. Remember, we don't drive.
So...
We have basic insurance and are paying for a whole family even though there are only two of us. I learned today that since the insurance changed in January, they've been charging me over $100 a month to rent the CPAP. So now I have a bill for almost $700 that I can't remotely pay. AND since I won't be able to pay any further bills, I have to give the fucking thing back.
And to be perfectly honest, it's making me cry like a little kid.
Pretty sure my mom was in the room the last time I felt this helpless...
BCBS used to offer us a decent plan. As long as a doc confirmed that I "really needed" something, I got it. That's how I finally got the mental, emotional, and medical help I needed. It's how I learned about my ulcers, my kidney-stones, and my random internal bleeding. It's also how I finally got the sleep study and CPAP I'd clearly needed since childhood.
I have memories of being 5 or 6 years old and not even being able to run for the school bus. I was tired my whole life. Because I was in the midst of such a warm wonderful family (sarcasm, dammit) I was constantly told I was "just lazy." I grew up thinking everyone felt like me, shitty and tired, but they pulled themselves out of it--and I didn't because I was SO lazy. When our appalling eating habits also made me fat, and that fat was then exacerbated by nearly a decade in the fast food industry--my body, and my credit were both pretty much ruined by the time I was 25. Yeah, there's more to that...but I digress.
It wasn't until I met H, and introduced a steady stream of love and support (and okay, income--not a lot of money, but I wasn't at risk of homelessness anymore) into life that it got any better. Having health insurance was a fucking godsend. Finally finding a doctor who didn't dismiss my rampant night terrors and hallucinations as "probably from smoking marijuana" (or saying it's brain damage and then not doing anything about it) and got me a damn sleep study. Turns out, I was damn near insane from lack of sleep, as I stopped breathing at least 80 times an hour.
I have the kind of apena that is hereditary. I've always had it, as has much of my family. Losing 200 pounds wouldn't make it go away. Even if it did, I'll probably need a good night's sleep before that happens. I've lost a bunch of weight since I got the CPAP, just because I'm awake and have energy.
Anyway, H's work used to offer 3 tiers of insurance: basic, medium, and fancy-pants. We couldn't afford the fancy-pants, but needed more than the basic.
They used to offer 3 plans: employee, employee plus spouse, and family.
We have no kids, so our choice was obvious.
FF to last year. They cancelled the medium plan, and canceled employee plus spouse. I worried that we'd have to cancel cable/internet/and one of our phones, which I didn't like, just to keep the insurance. I need the internet and cable to work. Turns out, that still wouldn't have been enough scrimping. We'd have needed to find a cheaper apartment, which would have meant an even worse neighborhood and MUCH farther for H to commute. Remember, we don't drive.
So...
We have basic insurance and are paying for a whole family even though there are only two of us. I learned today that since the insurance changed in January, they've been charging me over $100 a month to rent the CPAP. So now I have a bill for almost $700 that I can't remotely pay. AND since I won't be able to pay any further bills, I have to give the fucking thing back.
And to be perfectly honest, it's making me cry like a little kid.
Pretty sure my mom was in the room the last time I felt this helpless...