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wednes ([personal profile] wednes) wrote2007-09-07 01:15 pm
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Urge to kill...rising.

I'm totally starting to freak out about all the stuff that isn't done for the wedding. It's only five weeks away, and well, I'm not going to bore you with a list but a ton of shit isn't done. I feel like sobbing about it because most of it is out of my hands...it's frustrating me to the point of madness. If I didn't have drug issues I'd be getting myself some Xanax or Valium or any of that other shit housewives take to chill out. I always stress before a party, and this is the biggest and most important party of my life. I've been planning this thing for a year and it feels like nothing is done.

There's the unpleasant matter of the shower. For some reason I have to clean my house, bake, shop, make hors d'ouvres and deal with assorted madness and people all fucking weekend. I didn't even WANT a shower, and now the people who insisted on throwing one for me don't have the time or inclination to actually do anything for it. Ain't that a kick in the teeth? I'm sure it will be fine once people arrive and the games are underway, but right now I'm just a big bag of stress about it.

I really, really don't want to go to work today. But I can't call off since a) we're busy and b) I need the money. We have to pay for the cake soon, which is a dastardly $400. I still can't believe I'm paying that much for a damn cake. I was going to do the cakes myself until I saw some Bridezilla losing her damn mind trying to make enough cakes for a wedding. Everybody better tell me how much they love that cake or I'm going to be very sad.

Still haven't decided what I'm going to do about catering. My caterer, as I've mentioned, is an alcoholic who keeps relapsing (read: going on 3-day benders that require 3 more days of recovery and tapering off). If I fire her, she's going to be crushed. But dammit, it's my wedding and I shouldn't have to worry whether I'll have no food for my guests because some people can't control themselves. I know I'm the last person to talk about self control, but dammit, my issues don't spill out all over everyone I know or threaten to ruin anyone's wedding. I want to just call the Greek restaurant and have them cater. But that's my last resort plan if the caterer doesn't work out.

Haven't reserved any hotel rooms because I have no idea who is coming in from out of town, except H's family. RSVP's aren't due until the end of this month, so hopefully I'll know then. I suspect that most of my college buddies won't be coming, but I don't really know. Our budget is so tiny that I really need to know who all is coming, but I hear that most people don't bother to RSVP anyway. Do you assume that people who don't RSVP aren't coming? I imagine that's what I'll do. At least there'll be extra cake.

So maybe I am turning into a Bridezilla. I just want shit to go right, since it's costing us most of our savings just to put on this thing. I wish my MOH was closer, we'd be getting our drink on right about now.

Wow. I feel much better after getting all that out.

[identity profile] peteralway.livejournal.com 2007-09-07 06:13 pm (UTC)(link)
I always stress before a party, and this is the biggest and most important party of my life.

Repeat to self: It's only a party. It's only a party. It's only a fucking party.

All you need is some friends, and enough water and edible substances so nobody drops dead. Good people will appreciate what goes right, and ignore what goes wrong. Bad people--well, fuck 'em.

Good luck! I'm sure it will be fine.

[identity profile] wednes.livejournal.com 2007-09-07 06:20 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks Peter, I need to keep that in mind.

It's one of those girl things where we start planning our wedding when we get our first Bridal Barbie. By the time the big day gets here, it feels like it's 20 some years in the making (or 30 some in my case).

I just need to relax.

[identity profile] gifgal.livejournal.com 2007-09-07 06:46 pm (UTC)(link)
i dont think you're doing any extra or out of the ordinary freaking out---i think bridezillas got so much of a bad rap that it makes regular brides feel even more stressed, worrying about if they are being bridezilla-ish or not. and with the few circumstances (shower forced upon you and now you have to do all the work for it, and worrying about your caterer) youve every right to have an irrational freakout anyways hehe :)
so bring your freak on!

[identity profile] wednes.livejournal.com 2007-09-08 01:47 am (UTC)(link)
LOL Thanks for that.

*Freak commencing*

[identity profile] absinthofheart.livejournal.com 2007-09-07 07:16 pm (UTC)(link)
They say that a persons wedding day is the most stressful day they will experience in their life. (Or maybe it is in the top three...whatever, I'm just saying it is traditionally stressful.) Of course, planning the thing yourself makes it worse.
However, keep in mind that you are getting somethings cheaper and easier than most other people in your situation. That should cheer you up a little.

As for the shower...why are you stressing? We've all been to your house for parties before. You don't have to impress anyone. Especially not us slouches.

On the topic of the shower...we are broke. I can't bring a gift, but i do have a fully packed bridge card, so I can bring food. Is there anything you'd like me to bring?

On that same note, if you want pizza, we have no way to pay for it without you. We'll have to make some arrangements. Savvy?

Call me. Let me know what's up.

[identity profile] wednes.livejournal.com 2007-09-08 01:50 am (UTC)(link)
You know, I always stress before a party and it almost always turns out to be fine. This will just be an odd assortment of people--or at least I think it will. I don't know who all has RSVP'd for the shower because the girl organizing it hasn't told me. I dont' even know how many people to shop for and the shopping is tomorrow.

Oh well, if people don't get enough to eat we'll just order a damn pizza.
groovesinorbit: (willow and buffy)

[personal profile] groovesinorbit 2007-09-07 08:20 pm (UTC)(link)
You don't sound like a bridezilla to me. Whether the caterer is going to do her job certainly sounds like a legitimate concern. Sounds like you have a back-up plan, though.

People don't RSVP for weddings anymore? Boy, that's tacky. Yeah, I'd assume they're not coming either.

[identity profile] wednes.livejournal.com 2007-09-08 01:52 am (UTC)(link)
It's a pretty casual affair, so it's not a huge deal if people don't all RSVP. But people who are gonna need a hotel room or something really need to let me know that. Of course, they can't because my invitations haven't gone out yet. Soon though, soon (I hope).

[identity profile] lirrin.livejournal.com 2007-09-07 08:39 pm (UTC)(link)
Third flippin' time's the charm on that One Thing I Kept Screwing Up. ;) Your goodies will be on their way to you next week, by Friday. WHOOT! (At this point, I might hold off and send them all at once. Was gonna send the littler two and then the tiara later, but I think all three at once will be fine.)

"Dark purple sparkly" or "lavender with flecks of sparkly" purple is my only question, on that One Thing I Kept Screwing Up. :) Or I can flip the coin, whatever.

[identity profile] wednes.livejournal.com 2007-09-08 01:54 am (UTC)(link)
Dark purple sparkly sounds mighty appealing, but you're the expert. I trust your opinion.

Also, do you recall that I need a pendant somewhat similar to the rings for my ring bearer (who is a girl)? You hadn't mentioned it with the angel and the butterfly, so I just wanted to make sure you remember.

Gracias.

[identity profile] lirrin.livejournal.com 2007-09-09 03:17 am (UTC)(link)
Had forgotten, actually! Thanks for reminding me. It's totally no issue; that isn't very complex. :)

[identity profile] wednes.livejournal.com 2007-09-09 05:20 am (UTC)(link)
Cool, thanks!

[identity profile] maxverbosity.livejournal.com 2007-09-07 09:20 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, you will feel a profound sense of relief when the wedding bureaucracy is all over.....trust me on that one.

[identity profile] wednes.livejournal.com 2007-09-08 01:55 am (UTC)(link)
I imagine so. Plus it'll be time for the honeymoon, which is going to rock.

[identity profile] diachrony.livejournal.com 2007-09-08 03:39 am (UTC)(link)
This too shall pass ... and then you'll be married and having a rockin' honeymoon!

::sends "chill" vibes::

[identity profile] wednes.livejournal.com 2007-09-08 03:44 am (UTC)(link)
It's all true. Thanks for reminding me.

;-]

I don't know much bout weddings

[identity profile] urbanlawn.livejournal.com 2007-09-08 08:30 am (UTC)(link)
but I have a feeling it will all work out alright.

although do what you feel, and want, because it's your night and day to remember...

Re: I don't know much bout weddings

[identity profile] wednes.livejournal.com 2007-09-08 04:25 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, it'll work out. It always does...

Re: Off Topic, redux.

[identity profile] wednes.livejournal.com 2007-09-09 05:21 am (UTC)(link)
Ha!

Good one.

I always love zombie humor.

[identity profile] misanthropoet.livejournal.com 2007-09-09 05:36 am (UTC)(link)
I love the cake. ;)

[identity profile] wednes.livejournal.com 2007-09-09 05:45 am (UTC)(link)
:-]

[identity profile] bethie8888.livejournal.com 2007-09-09 11:50 pm (UTC)(link)
When I was planning, there was this odd time when it was too soon to finish planning but so close to the date that I felt like nothing was done and it was all going to shit.

It really does work out, though. And the thing is, everyone is coming to share the day with you and H. None of the detail-y bits really matter all that much when the day actually comes. No great comfort now, I know, but I thought I'd throw it out there.

[identity profile] wednes.livejournal.com 2007-09-10 12:08 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, I'm trying not to get too wrapped up in the details. I know in the end it'll all be okay, it usually is.