Things that came to pass today:

[wednes]

I found out that I may have some kind of PTSD. I find this odd because I had honestly never considered putting that label on it, even though I still flinch when people try to touch me unexpectedly. I always tell H to "quit lunging at me" when he's really just leaning in for a smooch. It also explians the nightmares and my aversion to quiet rooms and open spaces. So that is pretty interesting.

I've decided that I am indeed going to try going back on meds. This means that as of Feb 9th, I will have to quit smoking weed for at least 2 weeks. This should not be too difficult, after all, I can't shut up about how much I'm not an addict and don't think weed is a problem. Anyway, I just want to feel better, and if I can feel lousy for a few days, then better, I think I'll go with that. That said, they are talking about giving me something so I can sleep better. I didn't know there were non-addictive things to help people sleep. Like I keep saying, I don't want to swap addictions. But we'll see what happens when I see the doc on 02/10.

You know, I never heard from Walt to see if he got his holiday package from us. And for whatever reason, I'm not as broken up about it as one might expect.

I have been thinking a lot about my family, after having to talk about them all afternoon.
I wish I had the money to go ahead with my legal name change.
Of course, if I really can give up smoking pot, I would be able to afford it in virtually no time...probably within 6 months.

All this talk about me and my family is making the idea of working on my novella supremely distasteful. I need to break thru that because I really want it to get picked up. I'll be awfully bummed if this novella goes the way of my zombie story--which is still sitting in a folder on my desk despite the recent zombie film rennaisance. Pretty soon I'll be starting work on my "romance novel" (read: libro d'fuck) for which I have some very clever ideas for. At least, I think they're clever. I don't read those books, so they could be totally trite and overdone. Like thinking you've written some kind of modern classic horror film and it turns out to only be Gothika.

I also found out today that T. Thorn Coyle has a livejournal. That is pretty sweet.

Oh, is anyone doing the rabbit hole thing today? How's that going?

Comments

[sudrin.livejournal.com]

my friend kjtoo freaked my sh*t out with his Rabbit Hole post!

[wednes.livejournal.com]

Holy crap, that's crazy

[pleasing-tint.livejournal.com]

I've had sleep success with valerian root, an herbal sleep aid that seems to calm nicely. I like to take one around bill paying time when Mr Visa drops by. It doesn't addict but maybe you need something stronger. Just a suggestion.

[wednes.livejournal.com]

I have used valrian in the past, and it seems that it is contraindicated with some of the meds I'm already taking. Since I'm kind of a regular drug user, subtle herbal remedies don't work as well for me.

Thanks though, I certainly prefer to use herbal remedies when possible (pun intended).

[groovesinorbit]

Have you tried melatonin to help you sleep? I've been using it for years when I need something. Works like a charm. One of my co-workers is trying it out now, as it's supposed to help against migraines as well.

[wednes.livejournal.com]

I have in the past, but was concerned about wanting to use it every night. I try not to take anything but vitamins without an okay from the doc just because I have a pretty low threshold for addiction. I'm going to discuss melatonin with the doc though, and see what he reccomends.

I have this habit of being suspicious of doctors, but this one is actually pretty good.

[groovesinorbit]

I can be pretty suspicious of doctors, too. Glad to hear you've found a decent one. Definitely ask him about melatonin. I found a link that talks about some contraindications: http://www.melatonin.com/melatonin-faq1.htm. Don't know if that eliminates it for you or not.

[wednes.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

[man-bites-dog.livejournal.com]

That's kind of odd too, I avoid contact at pretty much any given moment. I'm really bad about it. But I do really like quiet rooms and open spaces.

I don't know if you've seen Cemetery Man(Dellamorte Dellamore) but if you haven't check it out. I find it a very inspiring movie, especially when writing.

[wednes.livejournal.com]

I hate Cemetary Man. I hate it almost as much as I hate Evil Dead movies. Sorry, man.

[man-bites-dog.livejournal.com]

Wow really? Did you like Bubba Ho-Tep? And do you hate the whole Evil Dead series or just a particular one? I thought you would have dug Cemetay Man.

[wednes.livejournal.com]

I would have thought so too. But alas, no.

I did like Bubba Ho Tep, though I thought the pacing was painfuly slow. That's probably the point, but I found it hard to watch.

I don't like any of the Evil Dead movies. Being from Michigan, horror people practically worship the Raimis. And make no mistake, I love the Raimis. But the dialogue is awful, and the acting is worse. I knwo they are low budget films, but good performances and good writing are free.
The plots are thin, the FX ridiculous and the whole tree rape thing was just plain dumb. Horror fans and especially zombie fans rip on me for this all the time, but I stand by it.

[groovesinorbit]

Not even Army of Darkness?

[wednes.livejournal.com]

That is the most tolerable of the series, but no.

[groovesinorbit]

Damn.

[man-bites-dog.livejournal.com]

I give you total credit for liking Ho-Tep without being a fan of the Evil Dead series. You're the first person I know who liked the movie not just because Bruce was in it. I personally hated it and thought it was a piece of crap but most everyone I know loves it, and more annoyingly just because Cambell was in it. Cool then, just wanted to know. Shaun of the Dead is an undisputed masterpiece.

[wednes.livejournal.com]

Well duh!

And you've got some red on you.