wednes: (The Horror Within)
In case you hadn't heard, The Horror Within website will be offline as of Nov. Sadly, I have neither the time nor the money to do this project as well as I want to. Too busy trying to chase the green and be a "real writer" to do all the non-essential horror writing that I want to. In fact, I'm doing almost no writing that I'm not getting decently paid for these days. I had many hopes and plans for The Horror Within, which honestly were not very realistic after our Kickstarter was a giant fail.

You may ask, Wednes, do you ever get tired of writing books people don't read, making audiobooks no one buys, publishing stories no one gives a shit about, or generally planning things that never end up happening in the way you intended?
Yes, in fact. Yes, I do. H says I only think I fail at stuff because I'm always trying new stuff. I dunno. I haven't written a book in forever, and haven't published one since 2012. I don't even have an idea for a book I'd feel passionate about. I have to think that if none of my stuff has taken off by now, it isn't going to. My mom's voice echoes in the back of my head, making me wonder why I ever thought I had enough talent to write anything in the first place.

Rather than whine about how everyone else's life seems to work out, and how writers I think are totally shitty have huge patreon funding and legions of fans--I'll just thank everyone for their support and figure out what thing I want to fail at next.

As for things to fail at, I'm taking suggestions.
wednes: (Go Crazy?)
I quit ArticleCats this week. Nice people there, but I've had 4 editors in the last 8 months because they all either quit or get fired. Lamesauce. Plus, my assignments there were boring, and the pay was too low.
Got offered another geekwriting gig. But again, not enough money for the work they're asking me to do.

It's not that I'm unwilling to write geekery for a low base wage. I am. But I only have so many hours a week to devote to stuff I don't make a decent wage from. Three reviews a week for peanuts is quite enough.

The new business venture H and I are doing is working out well. I've helped a handful of authors with getting their books formatted and ready for publishing. H is awesome at graphic design. So now we're hiring ourselves out as a full-service team for people trying to self publish. We edit, do layout and formatting, design covers and internal graphics, and offer marketing consultation. Our hourly rate is competitive--lower than many other places that do the same thing--yet still a wage that makes us happy. So that's been great.

If you haven't checked out, you should totally do so. We've got tons of great content up including great FREE fiction, an array of incredible art, reviews for movies, books, and TV, plus a lot of extra horror features. I'm thrilled with how well our staff has risen to the occasion, and with how great everything is going. I'd love to see more fiction subs. And I'd love for more authors to contact us about hyping their horror books.

Here's some fun news: I'm doing the NaNoWriMo this year. I haven't done it seriously since the aughts, so it's totally time. I have enough free time (is there really such a thing as "free time"?) these days, and a story that needs working on. So I'm prepping that now. Wish me luck! Um, unless you hate the NaNo, then don't.

Finally watching the Democratic debate. What strikes me the most after watching the GOP debate is that *this* is a stage full of politicians debating issues. It's fucking tragic to think that the most impressive feat of the Democrats might have done thus far is to not descend into a sea of prideful ignorance and playground insults. Even if Trump wasn't running, the GOP would still be a total shitshow. I'm still feeling the Bern, but everybody except Webb was fairly impressive.

Site Launch

Jul. 1st, 2015 08:25 pm
wednes: (The Horror Within)

The Horror Within is getting ready to launch. My cousin Rich is doing an awesome job of translating my many needs and wants into realities.

Stuff we'll have and do:
--Accounts for all regular contributors, plus blank accounts so that guest contributors and fiction submissions can all have proper bylines.
--Awesome graphics that H has been working his ass off on. (Don't worry, his actual ass is cute as ever)
--Normal stuff like FB like buttons, our Twitter feed, and cool widgets
--Soon everyone will have custom graphics for their regular content.
--Staff Emails
--A fully functioning Submission page, so we won't have to use submittable.
--The ability to do polls.
--Yoast SEO management.

There's probably more I'm forgetting. I'm awesome at forgetting.
I still need to find some fiction, reprints I think, to have ready for the first few weeks after launch. For the time being, we'll probably have new content a few times a week. Hoping though, that will become more frequent with time.

What we need:
--Regular interviewers to interview mostly writers and authors.
--Novelists who want to pimp their wares.
--Regular swag writer who can commit to 1-2 articles a month about horrific analog games, figures, apparel and other horror swag.
--People dying to advertise with us. :-)

In other news, I thought I was way more caught up with work than I actually am. Seems the calendar on my iPod is not syncing with my mac mini. Talk about first world problems that are a genuine pain in the ass...!

Getting more proactive about fiction writing and subbing. Added a subplot and roughly 1,000 words to my short story Raja, then subbed it to a paying market. I've always enjoyed that story a lot and look forward to finding it a good home.

Getting a free veggie spiraler so I can review it. Got some free massagers for review earlier in the week. No you filthy minded jackals, not THAT kind of massager. They're supposed to be for cellulite, but since I don't give a crap about cellulite, I'm just using them on my calves and thighs because it feels awesome. It's a nobbly roller thing, and pretty durable. Plus, I love getting free stuff. Because FREE stuff!
wednes: (The Horror Within)
The new site for The Horror Within is almost ready. Now that the foundation has been laid, it's just a matter of adding final graphics and organizing everything the way it needs to be. Then getting all the staff accounts ready. Oh, and I'll need some fiction to share with readers. Sad times, because I can't pay anyone yet. We'll be accepting reprints and actively seeking new authors. Plus I want to have novel chapters and interviews with up and coming writers and artists. That'll be good stuff!

My blood sugar has been kind of high. I was gonna buy an exercise bike, but found out that it's way cheaper to just buy the pedals and use them with a regular chair. I'm not really one for the fitness training. But something about having a sitting down job and sitting down hobbies has made me lazy as hell. So I'll be working on that, now that the pedals have arrived.

Going to the glasses emporium tomorrow to get an exam and new spectacles. I hope they have some I like. Our insurance went from awesome to lame, so the out-of-pocket promises to be hefty. I'll be sure to post a pic.

Having family visits next week, and some in July too. I hate having new people over to my apartment because it's such a filthy shithole. I really need to shampoo the carpets, but that's kind of a major and expensive undertaking. Plus, our vacuum, which we've had less than a year, is already making a terrible smell and not picking anything up. Fie!
wednes: (The Horror Within)
Whelp, we didn't make our funding goal. I seem to have dramatically overestimated my own visibility and esteem in the horror community. So, we won't be having a print mag where we pay pro rates any time soon.


But you know, that doesn't mean we're all washed up. We have a sweet masthead, a cool logo, and a staff who seems to want to keep it going. I'm pondering doing a quarterly digital antho, or maybe running The Horror Within as a website (one of our feature writers came up with that idea). This is something we can probably afford if any one of the many gigs I'm working toward pans out. We can certainly post regular features a few times a month, and maybe showcase some novel chapters and reprint fiction that deserves more notice. And we can have a newsletter so people can sign up if they want. Our main expense there would be paying someone to build the Wordpress site. I already have hosting and stuff.

In the mean time, I'm working on getting some out of print lit back on sale. And yeah, I did pick out an unfinished manuscript that totally deserves to see the light of day. Who knows, maybe I'll actually finish the Millicent Mixter draft while I'm about it.

Even though this turns out to be a fail, I'm not feeling like a failure because of it. If you read my self-indulgent rantings often--you'll know that this is kind of a big deal.
wednes: (Count Thumps Edward)
On the advice of the internets and H, I finally went to the goddamn doctor to talk about the goddamn depression that's been plaguing me all goddamn winter. It goddamn helped, a little. They suggested all sorts of pills, including many that I've tried before: Wellbutrin (makes me manic), Abilify (gives me crazy high blood sugar), Zyprexa (causes weight gain), and Latuda. That one is new, and is an anti-psychotic used for both schizophrenia and bi-polar. If I can afford it, I'm gonna give it a whirl. Because it's new, it won't be available as a generic. So I have no idea how much my insurance will cover and what the copay will be. Guess I'll find out soon enough.
It's always scary to take a new med though, I really super don't want to get manic.

Work is still tenuous. Still writing SEO and sex articles, and a bunch of new seasons are starting up for Geekbinge reviews. I was *holds up finger and thumb* THIS close to giving up 1-2 midseason shows so I'd have time to write more articles for the goddamn place that just fired all their goddamn freelancers. So very glad I dragged my feet on that one. I'd have been seriously kicking myself.

I did learn a valuable lesson about putting up with crap. Never again will I tolerate someone editing my author pic without my permission. Nor will I, for fuck's sake, tolerate an editor changing my byline without my say so. Can you even imagine changing someone's name without even telling them. "Wednesday Lee"?!? What the ever loving fuck?!?

Still looking for another writing gig. It's been almost 2 weeks, which I know is not a long time in the grand scheme of job searching. But damn, I'm ready to get back into it. I do have a few irons in a few fires, so we'll see what ends up bursting into flames, I guess.
wednes: (The Horror Within)
At the Delonis shelter in Ann Arbor, homeless people have to take a drug test before they can be admitted. If they can't pass a test within three days, they don't get to stay and work the program. However, if the weather is below 20 degrees F, anyone can stay in the sitting room so nobody freezes to death--even if you can't pass a drug test.

When I was learning this in the training classes for volunteers, the instructor couldn't remember if it was "20 degrees or below" or "twenty degrees below." Finally she reasoned that 20 degrees below zero was absurdly cold--in fact, we all had to think hard to recall if we'd ever been in a place where the temperature was literally 20 below, not factoring for wind.

Well kids, when I checked the weather at 5am this morning, it was 27 degrees below zero. And all I could think was, that shelter has got to be fucking packed.

In other news, the Kickstarter for The Horror Within is slow going. I made a new video in the hopes that it explains who we are and what we do a little more clearly.

We have 20 days remaining, so please do tell everyone you know about it--especially writers, horror fans, rich people with money to burn, and budding philanthropists.
wednes: (The Horror Within)
After much cajoling and craziness, The Horror Within Kickstarter is up and running. I've supported plenty of things at Kickstarter over the years, so it's my hope that all that good karma will help me now. Yes, I realize I'm referring to a bogus, Americanized version of karma--still, I'm hoping for it.

After one day, we're just shy of the 5% mark. I've sent a few press releases out, and plan to send a bunch more now that we're live. Here's the link to donate!

If you can't afford to donate, that's cool. Why not talk it up to your friends and wealthy relatives? Mention how much I love horror and how I have a goodly amount of experience running a magazine. Talk about how important it is to support indie horror, Women in Horror, and to find undiscovered talent and share their stories with horror fans everywhere. I think I have strong skill in editing and polishing stories to bring out their terror and beauty, and I can't wait to get back in the habit of putting out new issues regularly.

Here's our vid. Music is by Peter Alway:

Wish me luck!
wednes: (Santa?)
Skipping this week's ZZN repost mainly because I'm just not feeling it. The new site I'm writing for is giving me "share post" overload, because I'm constantly being asked to share posts for the dozen+ new articles I'm writing every week.

Now for the obligatory statement that all this paid work is taking time away from my fiction. I'm pulling out an old manuscript to work on soon. Wish I had a tablet on which I could edit it--like an electronic notebook. If my kickstarter works out the way I want it to, I may be able to do just that.

The birthday party was awesome. Lots of people showed up, and spaced themselves out well enough that we were only rarely low on seating. I actually drank some booze at the party--some stuff friends brought that's made from grapes (liquor, not wine) and tasted like a yummy cross between rum and tequila, if you can imagine such a thing. Trifle was awesome, bean dip was fine but nothing to write home about. Great crowd--plus my brother got me The Walking Dead Monopoly game that came with a MacFarlane figure of The Governor. It even has two heads--a one eyed and a regular. Neat!

All done with Under the Bed magazine as of now. Hoping to have the vid done for the Horror Within Kickstarter done by the 15th of this month.
Wish me luck!
wednes: (The Horror Within)
Been spending less time online than usual, mainly because I'm developing the incredible superpower known as Not Engaging. I'm disgusted to see and hear the rampant racism and hate from people I normally think are only kind of stupid. If you're really more upset about the "rioters" than about another person getting away with murder, I don't know what you and I could possibly have to say to each other.

My birthday was nice, but the real celebrating will happen on Saturday.
H and I ordered some mexican food and watched our shows off the DVR.
He made me another cool card full of loving sentiment.
H also made me a mini poster of my new logo (which you can also see in this user icon) for The Horror Within.
And he got me two knew Funko figures: Brienne of Tarth from Game of Thrones, and Papa Legba from last season's American Horror Story. Coo el!

We're having Thanksgiving dinner today so we can work around H's work schedule. I'm making a spicy mexican meatloaf that's stuffed with cheddar and jalapenos. On top is bacon. Because, bacon.
With it, we're having a cheese green bean casserole and a heap of mashed potatoes with scallions. It will be ready in about a half an hour, and I predict it will be delicious. The meatloaf is cooking on a wire rack with a pan under it so it isn't marinating in grease. I've got my girlish figure to think about, after all.

The party on Saturday promises to be awesome. Great company, one of my famous trifles (coconut cake with chocolate filling and Cool WHip--because fuck all that nonsense about natural this and organic that. ;-) Okay, not really. I just love Cool WHip. Also, my famous party bean dip.
Be there or kindly be square.
wednes: (Under the Bed)
I was not planning to make this announcement until the December issue of Under the Bed was out. But alas, word is getting around. I'm surprised anyone is interested, but then, I'm pretty awesome.

For those who have not heard yet, the December issue of Under the Bed will be my final issue for FictionMagazines/eFiction. This was a tough decision that I made after much deliberation. Honestly, I wish I didn't have to go. But I do. FicMag's editor-in-chief will be taking over mag operations as of Dec 4th.

The good news? The feature writers and graphic designer are joining me in a new publication:
The Horror Within.

To make this happen the way I want it to, we'll need a successful Kickstarter.

How do I want this to go?

For now, I'm thinking it will be a bi-monthly (every other month, so six issues a year) mag that features five scary short stories, and 3-5 regular features. I'd also like to bring in guest feature writers, and invite novelists to promote their upcoming novels with preview chapters and interviews. I want to continue doing artist interviews, and will offer free ad space to all indie horror purveyors.

I'm not sure about the logistics of distribution, but it may all go through Amazon. Also, we're doing print. That's right, print, as well as digital. Honestly, getting published is not as fun when you don't have the option to get a hard copy. Yeah, that's expensive, but I'm worth it--and so will this new project be.

I was worried that H would not be able to create a logo I loved as much as Under the Bed. Damn, I love that logo and am sad to leave it behind. You can all let me know what you think of the new logo and header, Read more... )

I think it looks pretty cool.

Oh, and digital copies of the first issue is gonna be freer than free. Kickstarter permitting, contributors will be paid a flat fee (better than my original idea of asking everyone to donate) for the issue, and hopefully everyone in the world will want to read it. Print issues will be avail for cost.
After the first issue is produced, subsequent issues will offer a royalty share. Fic authors will share 50% of single issue sales, while feature writers will share 50% of subscription sales. Neat, eh?

The plan is to go live in the spring.
wednes: (Vyv ;-()
When I read other authors talk about their marketing techniques, a lot of them say they never talk about politics online. They say it's alienating to readers who don't agree with them, and they don't want to offend people. Obviously, it's their choice to discuss or not discuss whatever they want.

For me though...
it feels like a cop-out to refrain from commenting on the news of the day. And by that, I mean actual news--not celebrity foolishness or some lady who got into a car accident when she was shaving her privates.

I was accused of "trying to be the internet police" this weekend when I called someone out for posting something hateful. I do that. If the poster or speaker is someone I have an actual friendship with (whether online or RL), I feel complicit if I see certain things without comment. These include hateful, racist, or sexist language, reinforcement of stereotypes, or things that are demonstrably and/or provably false. So if you're laughing at disabled fat people, accusing 16-year-old girls of "slutting it up," or suggesting compulsory drug testing for all pregnant women--you can expect to hear my reasoned dissent.

It would be easy to say "If you don't like what I post, don't read it," or "Get the hell off my page if you can't handle what I'm laying down." But honestly, if someone actually disagrees with me to the point where it makes them dislike me as a person, or avoid my work like I'm some kind of Orson Scott Card--what I honestly hope for is that they approach me to talk about it. My point has never been to declare things and then close off all discussion.

Anything I post, I'm willing to defend. Any question someone has, I'll do my best to answer it. People have asked me all manner of things from how much I weigh, to things about my sex life, to whether or not I've ever actually wanted to kill someone, or if I've have had sex for money. Granted, I may tell someone that their question is none of anybody's goddamn business--but even after I do that, I still might answer.

Ultimately, I like discussing the big issues--particularly among those with whom I disagree. I've had great conversations with conservatives about fiscal conservatism, the purpose and realities of welfare, equality in the legal system, guns, drugs, and plenty of other divisive topics. Rational discussion is how we learn and progress as a people. What I won't do is dignify asinine stances with rational debate. If you think black people commit more crimes than white people, or that gays are icky and what they do shouldn't be marriage--my willingness to discuss that is limited.

This post was stemmed from another writer who asked me if I worry that "all this political talk" is costing me sales. I have to say, refraining from discussing things I find important is far too big a price to pay just to sell some books. I tend to blame my miniscule advertising budget anyway. Besides, if you read my books you're gonna get a tiny dose of my politics anyway. The Finster Effect is pretty damn political, and S4S and KMLYLM both deal with social issues galore.
wednes: (Work)
Feeling pretty awesome right now.
Not so much because I'm doing great things, but because I'm trying my very best to do great things.

I feel better physically when I exercise. Instead of just knowing that and making excuses for why I'm not doing it--I'm doing it and feeling it and it's all good.

Ditto money making, being awake when the sun is out, cooking proper food daily, and a few other things that are making me feel utterly amazing.

Also spending much less time on the internet, stopped with the click-bait and "news" articles meant mainly to enrage rather than inform.

In the back of my mind, I'm wondering what emotional tragedy or anxiety ridden thing will happen to throw a spanner in the works.
For now though, it's all pretty good.
wednes: (Default)
It's in quotes because it was 66 degrees yesterday. Even for Michigan, that's a bit of a WTF.

Summer also used to be a barren wasteland for TV. This summer I'm reviewing Under the Dome (which sucks) and hate-watching the last season of True Blood, because closure.

However, Defiance is back and awesome. Maron has been great, and now we're watching Extant (the Halle Berry future thing) and The Strain (a vampire thing written by Guillermo Del Toro) and Falling Skies. H is also watching something called The Last Ship, and Dominion, plus I'm watching The Leftovers, which has been amazing so far. Jon Simm has a new show starting soon, which we're gonna watch the crap out of.

That's an awful lot of TV for summertime.

I'm finally re-setup with PayPal here, which I love.

My Adam Ant autobiography finally arrived today. Can't wait to dive into it, because mentally odd people tend to be equally frustrating and fascinating. I don't invite many people like that into my life anymore, so reading about them in well-written books is a joy.

Got a few projects going on right now, but can't actually post about them yet. The mag is going well, and this months issue has some particularly strong content. Loving my feature writers, and really wishing I could afford to pay them.
wednes: (Under the Bed)
LinkedIn reminded people to wish me a happy Work Anniversary, because I've been doing Under the Bed magazine for a whole year. I know, right?

Have you read an issue? If so, you might should review it on Amazon. If you haven't, see me for a free issue so you can take a look-see before you review it on Amazon. See what I did there?

I have learned a ton in the year I've been doing this. I fancy myself a pretty good editor. The layouts are simple and chock full of strong material. After much struggling, I finally learned how to convert my awesome layouts into readable epub and Mobi files. That was a nightmare that took me months.
I'm also better at turning down stories in an encouraging way, and convincing stubborn writers why my many edits are a good idea. It's amazing how great the spectrum is on that--from "please, edit as much as you possibly can" and "who do you think you are wanting to touch a single letter?!?!11!" So that has been fun. I also know more about writing in general since I understand what doesn't work so much more fully.

Problem is, I do so much mag work and reviews and commission work that I never write fiction anymore. Even the Millicent Mixter book keeps getting pushed aside for paid work.

Thinking about setting myself up with some basic art supplies. Want to try some impressionistic and expressionistic work. Not sure I want to mess around with paint, but a decent pad of paper and some appropriate markers might be a good place to start. Anyone who has seen my comic knows that I suck at drawing, and have no flair for choosing fonts.

In case any of you didn't know, Under the Bed magazine offers FREE advertising for indie authors, publishers, artists, filmmakers, and the like. Want to advertise your FX prowess? Do it here. Got a novel, antho, or art show coming up? Want to drive people to your blog or podcast? If it's horror, we wanna know about it! To hit me up about the mag: Wednesday (at) fictionmagazines dot com.
wednes: (Under the Bed)
I'm nearing the one year anniversary of my involvement with the mag. Granted, the first issue of Under the Bed didn't go live until August, but I started working for eFiction in June, and put out the last issue of eHorror before I magically transformed it into what it is today.

The first year was incredibly stressful, no doubt exacerbated by my own incompetence, the insane amount of pressure I was putting on myself, and my habit of grossly exaggerating the expected returns. Just like when I first got published, I presumed I'd make enough money the first year to buy a new computer. Without embarrassing us all with the actual numbers, let's just say, I haven't.

But you know, my first year at Shar was pretty terrible. I was in way over my head, having slightly exaggerated my own musical knowledge. After that, it got a lot better--which is to say, I got way better at it. I became more confident in the knowledge I did have, and better able to compensate for the stuff I didn't know. After that, I just kept on learning things until I decided I didn't like them anymore.

My first year of college was also difficult. When I got there, I was so incredibly scared and intimidated, I didn't eat for almost 3 days because I didn't want to be seen in the cafeteria alone. It got better though, as everything seems to if I stick it out long enough.

So I guess that's the pattern. The first year of anything worthwhile will probably suck. My first year with H didn't suck, but there was a definite learning curve. I had no idea how to treat someone who was always kind and respectful to me, or how to manage a healthy relationship. That took at least a year, presuming that I've learned it now. ;-)

I guess the question is, what should I do next? I'm def gonna stick it out with the magazine, for as long as my computer allows it, at least. It's maddeningly slow at times, but it's still chugging right along. But I'm thinking of doing some self-publishing since I actually seem to know how. I haven't been writing much fiction, and I really need to be working on Millicent Mixter. I'm writing that one using Scrivener. That's a sweet program, though I wish it had some color adjust options. Black on White is not a great color scheme for me.

How and When I learned *Computers* )That's funny, because I don't even have an iPhone.
wednes: (Snakes on a Plane)
Did the mag layout tonight in about 3 hours. Seems like it's gone okay. Once I get edits from the authors, I'll do the conversions and turn it in. It's another strong issue, and I love that we have a solid movie reviewer and a lit reviewer. I'd still like to find somebody to write about videogames though. You'd think that would be easier to find. I guess too many gamers would rather game than write about gaming. Jerks!

Friday's Pics continues to be fun and well enjoyed. Apparently I've inspired some youngsters to watch better movies. Yay!

I'm not posting a pic, but I did get an awesome haircut. It's nice and short in the back and almost chin length in the front. Nolas Underground Salon is def my new hair place. Dani is a hairgician, and everyone should see her. I'd never waited 10 days to see a hairdresser before, but she was totally worth it.

Bates Motel had a few slow episodes toward the middle of the season, but it's wrapping up with a vengeance. I'm beginning to wonder if this won't be the season Norma gets it. Game of Thrones is progressing nicely, and I'm pretty stoked to start reviewing Penny Dreadful on Showtime.

I'm pretty sad that Colbert Report is ending.
But John Oliver starts this week.
Sunrise, sunset. LOL
wednes: (Elephant on Trampoline)
I'm a little behind on work due to a combination of sleeping a lot and being more social. As a result, I have to work today and tomorrow even though H is off work for the big egg-hunting holiday. Not a big whoop though. We're also gonna have salad and tuna croquettes for dinner, followed by the first night of that Sci-Fi special BBC is showing. That's gonna be sweet. I think it's about Robots. And my tuna croquettes are insanely delicious. I use jalapeno instead of scallions and top with a mixture of avocado, lime juice, and labne.

Have 3 more stories to edit for the June issue. I'm still figuring out how aggressively to edit these stories. Some need very little, while others need much more--which is expected, obvs. I worry though, when authors get pissy about edits, that maybe I'm being too slashy with my metaphorical red pen. Thing is, I very rarely press for a specific edit. My edits are plentiful sometimes, but they're always given as suggestions. I suppose if I always give authors the option of accepting or rejecting each change (Thank you, MSWord), I'm not being "a tyrant" even if I make a zillion edits. Yes, someone has actually called me a tyrant, while another asshole decided that going over my edits was too time intensive, and went on to lecture me about time being valuable and him putting "all the time in on this story" that he intended to. WTF really? I found that so pretentious I thought the guy might have been punking me. But he didn't say shit when I took him out of the payroll.

H is starting physical therapy on Monday. I worry, because H doesn't do medical stuff well. But he fell and hurt his arm, and it still hurt 3 weeks later, so he has to. At least it won't be crazy expensive. Our insurance covers a lot more now. Plus, we'll be out all day Monday at appointments so I'm making a broccoli cheese soup in the crock pot. So pleased to have a nice crock pot since my old one was a total crapshack.

Decided not to watch Fargo after all. I don't really have time for a new show. Plus I heard they don't have a Marge Gunderson. I call bullshit on that.
Have you seen this Jimi Hendrix biography where Bootsy Collins reads Jimi's bio in the first-person? It's badass.

Game of Thrones has been pretty good so far this season.
Let the bodies hit the floor, amirite?


Apr. 8th, 2014 06:48 am
wednes: (Wednes Logo)
Made a few adjustments to my Goodreads advertisements. In the space of one week, I literally increased my views ten times, and my clicks five times. Did not expect so dramatic an increase. I thought small targeting of specific readers would be better for me, but maybe not. I guess I'll have to wait and see if it translates into sales.

Still trying to chase down more freelance work. Know anybody who needs SEO, blogs, or anything I'm good tell. Geekbinge site has been wonky lately, but I'm told it will be fixed soon.

Did I already mention that Under the Bed is going to print? Yes, I'm told it will be this summer, so we shall see. I'm guessing that issues will be right around $10. Won't that be fun?

Got an extension on my taxes, and am going to file my Michigan return on paper. Turbo Tax is just too expensive for me now that I'm freelancing, which sucks, because now is when I really need the good version. I just can't pay an extra $170 on top of the $350 or so I owe the gub-mint. Being poor blows. Too bad I plumb forgot to be rich.


Mar. 22nd, 2014 02:22 pm
wednes: (Colbert Rage)
How to enrage an editor:

1. Add typos after the edit is done.

2. Format unevenly, then become perplexed that this shows in the final document.

2.5 Format in such a way that the editor has to go through the entire document, line by line. (ie: some paragraphs manually indented, others not)

3. Not follow clear instructions; complain because instructions were expected to be followed.

4. Tell editor to change things that should have been addressed before submission (like say, a character's name).

5. Say "Once you get published, you'll understand how busy writers are."

This last one is not just factually incorrect, it doesn't make any goddamn sense. Gah!
wednes: (Seriously?)
H and I finished the first season of Torchwood. It got better as it went along. First ep of season two had James Marsters. I had to explain to H who he was and where we'd seen him before. We don't do a lot of Joss Whedon stuff.

The magazine now has what will be two recurring columns. Journey into the Netflix Queue discusses a horror movie that is available in Netflix instant streaming. They've all been excellent so far. We also have a lit reviewer who'll be posting spoiler-free book reviews. I'm still looking for a videogame writer. Know anyone who wants to write about past and present scary games? Please do send them my way.

Was concerned about Pentelope's recent lethargy and extra puke. After all, she's fourteen years old. Turns out, she had a cold and is now better.

Since we're saving so much money on medical stuff, we decided to restart our bi-weekly organic produce delivery. It's so awesome. On the weeks we don't shop, we get a box of in-season organic fruits and veggies delivered for slightly more than the cab ride to and from the store (not counting the purchase of food). I love them. If you have one near you, I highly recommend Door to Door Organics. If you do decide to sign up with them, please mention my name since I'll get free stuff if you do.

I predict that this months magazine layout will be the least frustrating yet, mainly because I finally think I understand how this all works. Conversions ahoy! Not sure why this information wasn't simple to access or understand, but whatevs. It will all be helpful to know once I finish the Millicent Mixter book.


Mar. 13th, 2014 10:27 am
wednes: (Pot meets Kettle)
I've had a low grade flu since the weekend. You'd think it would be gone by now. Or maybe I caught it on Monday since I spent the day with a kid. Kids are little sickness factories, especially since they spend so much time with other kids. Anyway, not feeling so hot.

Been trying to get up at a more reasonable hour, lay off that stuff I like, and just generally be less of a recluse. But people suck. I mean, I believe that people are basically good, and that if we take the time to get to know most people--we'll have more understanding and all that there. Internet-wise though, people are assholes. I got so annoyed with someone this morning I told them they had sand in their vagina. Not something I would normally do.

I've always been more of a night person than a day person, and I'm wondering if it might be because day people are jerks.

Was gonna watch Those Who Kill since I still have the first 2 eps on my DVR. Alas, it's already been pulled from the schedule. Sorry, Chloe.

Been waiting for a phone call about a job for the last hour and a half. They gave me a 1-hour window, so I'm irked that I'm still waiting. Plus, I have to call Uverse. Curious to find out why they think we should pay them $193 a month for slow internet and sub-par cable. At least Comcast has an awesome product to go with their awesomely huge rates.

The mag now has a movie reviewer and a book reviewer. Hoping to find a video game writer. You'd think it would be easy, given how many gamers I know. It's not though. *sigh*
wednes: (Wednes Logo)
You'll all be thrilled to know that the 2nd edition of A Stabbing for Sadie is available now wherever fine eBooks are sold. I imagine Amazon is where most of you will be picking up this awesomely edited, vastly improved version of my debut novel. Smashwords also has it in a variety of DRM free formats.

cover by David Dodd

Haven't read my first book? It's about a mentally unstable chick trying to shake off her miserable formative years and develop into something better. But, she's confused, ill, tired, and poor. Luckily, she's also witty, honest, and complicated while having a knack for bitter sarcasm and knee-slapping humor.

Did a Guest Blog recently, about how point-of-view impacts the relationship between characters and readers. I use popular examples like The Girl Next Door, Carrie, and Fowles The Collector. Then, of course, I talk about my own books as well. I think it's a pretty good read. I'd be stoked if it got some real play. Personally, I don't think horror writers talk about POV and narrative voice nearly as much as they should.

Things at Under the Bed magazine are still a fine mix of frustration and awesome. The issues continue to get better and better. We're taking on a lit reviewer and looking for a videogame writer, and we have an excellent film reviewer (Psst, it's [personal profile] porcelain72). We don't get enough Letters to the Editor though. You guys should send some in:
wednes: (Neville)
H and I took a look at Good Day to Die Hard. We didn't watch it, per se, just took a look. It was super explosiony and lacked any sense of why people liked Die Hard in the first place. Anyway, the movie takes place in Russia. McLean is pissy because everyone is speaking Russian--in RUSSIA. He actually punches a guy at one point because he's mad that the guy is speaking Russian. That's basically a hate crime--and he's the goddamn hero. Lame, and John McLean is just cartoonish at this point. That especially sucks because we know he's capable of so much more.

Speaking of actors who give us more, film and theatre fans were collectively punched in the dick this weekend with the untimely death of Phillip Seymour Hoffman I won't belabor the obvious loss to his medium, and to all of us who enjoyed watching him do his thing. In a dream world, he would have played Mikey Goretti in a film version of Kiss Me Like You Love Me. I can't begin to imagine who I'd cast now.
Anyway, it's clear to me that the more intuitive a person is, the more difficult it is to deal with what they know. This probably sounds douchey, but I hate the kind of understanding I have of my fellow humans. I further hate that seeing people has not helped me to be more empathetic, though it does lead me to make excuses for keeping people in my life when I know intellectually that they shouldn't be there. In the end, using intuition, empathy, and understanding to communicate something vital? Awesome, practically the meaning of life. But what's awesome for society can be excruciating to the individual.

So, I read the Hunger Games trilogy in less than a week. Cut for spoilers and swears ) Imma check out the first two movies when I'm caught up on work. I hear the first is not great but the second is better. Feel free to agree or disagree in the comments.

Still having a tough time with the mag conversions. Getting closer though. I'm told that Under the Bed's layout is complicated compared to the other mags. I didn't really think it was--I'm just trying to make it look nice and have a good vibe. I had a bunch of ideas for stuff I want to do when I'm better with the program. If you've checked it out, I'd be grateful for your input on the layout.
Maybe I should get better at cutting myself some slack.
I'm behind with work in general, as are a few of my bosses/editors. I think the cold is slowing us all down.

We watched a horror movie called The Colony, mainly because it was a horror movie and contained Bill Paxton. He didn't look so good in it, and he was a jerk, and he died. Not a bad movie overall, just really ordinary.

I've been buying stuff lately. Got a few pieces of inexpensive jewelry ($13 for both things including shipping!!) that I love. One is a Dumbledore's Army pendant that looks like a scroll, and the other is a glass egg that looks like there's a tiny dinosaur embryo inside. It's badass, and made by one of my fave etsy jewelry chicks. I also had to get a new Logitech Marble Mouse. I swear, it's the greatest mouse in the world--except that they're practically disposable. I don't think I've ever gotten more than 2 years out of one. But they're cheap and work great...until they don't.
I also got us a living room lamp because it's damn dark in here with just one. I have a bunch of crafty projects I want to do--many of which are thinkin' frogs. But I can't do them because there isn't enough light. I also got a piece of wood I'm gonna make a ouija board out of, and a cool planchette I found on etsy.
wednes: (NaNo Runner)
I've been pretty busy lately, and also somewhat sidelined by an injury. Last week I was cleaning the bathroom when my back suddenly seized for no apparent reason. It took me literal minutes before I could straighten it up. Then my left leg got a charley horse that lasted 5 days and hasn't completely gone away. Apparently, this is called "Sciatica" and is a friggin' pain in the ass, and the leg, and also specifically the calf. God DAMN it hurt. Came and went for no apparent reason. Calling the doc on Monday to find out WTF, even though it is slowly getting better thanks to time, stretching, and resting.
I am awesome at resting.

The Mag gets better and better with every issue. I'm still figuring shit out, and my conversions are not all they could be. The last issue had an annoying issue with the Contents page. I thought it was getting fixed, but then it went out unfixed. Still, that issue is full of strong material, cool art, and great features. I'd like to take on a book reviewer and a miscellany reviewer who can talk about TV, videogames, stuff like that. If you know anyone who wants to work for free and is awesome, do send them my way.

Under the cut is the cover for the February issue. )

I got offered a gig writing 10,000 word eBooks for $100. I thought about it, and realized that would be dumb. Ghost writing should pay a lot more than that. Then the proverbial lightbulb went over my head. I was gonna write this book about Customer Service--the Millicent Mixter book. But then the publishing house that was gonna publish it closed up shop and I was getting the freelance thing off the ground and then the mag happened...long story short, I never finished it. Right now it's a collection of notes, some partial sections, and a great outline.
I set myself up a schedule that, if I can stick to it, will have a solid draft by the end of March. Then there will be beta readers and hopefully some art for the inside and cover. Seems like it might be a good book for fall. But I don't want to rush it. I'm pretty excited about that. I'll even be able to lay it out myself. It'll be my first self-published book, and it won't even be dinosaur porn!

And now for something completely different...

"New Year"

Jan. 6th, 2014 04:24 am
wednes: (Wut?  JoJo)
I still think it's dumb to start a new year in the middle of winter. Where I am, there's literally a foot of snow on the ground, and even seasoned Michiganders (NOT Michiganians though, because fuck them!) are losing their shit. It's dangerous out there, folks. I predict that H and I will have a spirited argument when he goes back to work Wednesday night. He'll insist that it's perfectly safe to walk a mile to the bus stop. I'll disagree strenuously and end up envisioning stoned Ann Arborites sliding their Volkswagons off the road and right into H.


Otherwise though, all is well at Chez Wednes.
I decided to by myself the damn Furby (*Zoidberg voice* Why not?) since I was rolling in gift certificates and totally wanted one. Sadly, the accompanying app will not work on my iPod. I've been thinking about getting a new iPod touch (or probably a newer refurbished one), since I need a way to take credit cards at events. After I figure out a new computer, that will be my next fanciful tech-want.

Been looking around to pick up another writing gig. I'm amazed at how little some of these places are offering when they want people who've been published in national magazines. Two dollars a page. Really?

Technical issues at the mag continue to vex me. I'm told that the EiC will be more available this year, so that will be good. There's a lot of great fiction coming up. Artists continue to be awesome in letting us use their work. The Feb cover is creepy cute, while March will be downright gruesome. Working with authors continues to have its challenges. Who knew customer service skills would come in so handy working with pushy authors and their fragile author egos? Oh wait, I did. ;-) Anyway, the January issue will be available on Amazon soon. If you've been readin' the mag it would be awesome if you could take a mo' and leave a review. If you'd like a review copy to check out (you'll need to leave a review at Amazon and Goodreads to get a freebie), hit me up.

Been actually writing the screenplay instead of just talking about it. For now, Final Draft is the software that's working best for me. I really only like Word for stuff that's full of paragraphs. It's not as funny as it should be yet. After I lay out the story, I can go back through and punch it up.

Did I already post about Stoker? OMG it was fucking incredible. The cast was pitch-perfect--Matthew Goode is one of the creepiest guys in the world--except usually he does romantic comedies. Ew, right? Stoker was truly exceptional. Scary, sexy, suspenseful, and damn surprising. Loved it.

Holly Daze

Dec. 12th, 2013 07:37 pm
wednes: (Vincent)
I didn't make it to mass at St Francis last week despite my best efforts. Snow and cabs thwarted me. This week, I shall time call! (for non-cab people, this means scheduling the cab the night before)

I decided to take it really easy on myself this holiday season. We're not having anyone over for New Years Eve, first of all. So that's a LOT of cooking I won't have to do. I'm also not baking anything, except for H's birthday. Even with very little family in the area, there seems to be such a glut of cookies, fudge, and other holiday sweets that giving them out starts to seem like a cumbersome imposition.
In contrast, my Wednes-made lip balms have been turning out well and are pretty popular. Most of them can be sent with cards in padded mailers (H always makes us an awesome card). And nobody has to lay any diet-shaming talk on me about how "naughty" they'll feel when they eat cookies--because unless you're a disturbed youngster, you don't eat lip balm.

Aside from H and my goddaughter, I'm also not buying many presents. I get a little splashy with birthday gifts, but Xmas is just too huge and spendy to be getting pressies for everyone. That said, I did buy my goddaughter a Furby. I got an awesome Black Friday (why you gotta bring race into it?!?) deal on it, and I know she really wanted it. Honestly, I wouldn't mind a play robot myself, but I'm certainly not spending that kind of money on a toy for me.

Computer is worse than ever. In addition to having a broken click-bar, I'm looking at 12+ minutes to open Photoshop, and sometimes 10 minutes just for MS Word. Bearing in mind that I have to run INDesign including conversions, it's very frustrating. If I leave it unplugged, it will shut down itself at 20% power and without a warning. Gah! Mostly, I want to replace this computer before it shuts down completely and I can't get my stuff off it. I only have so many tiny flash drives, and most of them will not hold the magazine archive. *sigh* The down side to working at home and online is that if anything happens to my computer, I'm pretty much boned.

In better news, you can now Subscribe to Under the Bed magazine at Amazon. B&N is still taking a stupid long time to get the new issues up, but you can buy single issues from them. The best place to get single issues though, is at the FicMag website.

Found out today that there's a short film adaptation of Abed which is a short story I first read in Skipp and Spector's Book(s) of the Dead which I was just talking about on Facebook as being particularly influential to me. This particular story is now sold singly, with the same publisher as me, in fact. I'll be receiving a review copy soon, so that's fly. ZZN is starting to get active again. I'm throwing up my thoughts on Walking Dead this weekend if I have time. Mostly though, I'll be editing stories for the Feb issue and laying out the Jan issue once H gets the graphics to me.


Dec. 4th, 2013 04:54 pm
wednes: (Count Thumps Edward)
So, you know how I write SEO for a living? And how I supplement that with sex articles and TV reviews and book reviews and blogs and then I run an entire magazine?

Well, all that has left me with very little time or energy to write fiction.
This will not do...

I fully intended to NaNoWriMo that script I keep talking about. Guess what though? I didn't do it. Part of that was time related. Another part was that if I get a lot of work done, and make a reasonable amount of money--I feel enough sense of accomplishment that I don't feel like I need to do anything else on a given day. That's a BIG part of the problem.

I intend to scale back on GeekBinge reviews. They are enormous fun, but don't pay shit. Worse, they just aren't getting the play that they should be. Maybe they are too long? I won't be scaling back for a few weeks though. Mob City starts tonight and I'm totally covering it even though it's the same night as American Horror Story: Coven.
Got a new gig this week, writing reviews of non-fic books that I get for free. Yeah...they had me at free books.

So yeah, the next thing I write should be that screenplay for SyFy. I'll have to find an agent just to shop that, which will probably be really hard. But I have no excuse for not writing it. I just haven't been pushing myself as hard as I could have--unless catching up on four seasons of Community counts as pushing myself. I strongly suspect that it does not.

After the script is done and shopping for an agent begins, I should finish that short story I started for an antho that I never subbed it to. Yeah...

But then, I should really look through my pile of half-finished novels and see which one I should pull out and work on. What to do About Franklin has some promising characters. It was an attempt to write something with the scope, humor, and gruesome shit as a Christopher Moore Pine Cove book. The main lesson I learned that I shouldn't bother trying to emulate other writers. Mainly because, fuck that shit. Also, I would hate it if anyone tried to write like me on purpose. I'm so damaged emotionally that when I see that people are trying to get on my good side, it makes me think less of them. As in the popular Simpsons phrase You WOULD like me, Loser!
There's that other book with a title so lame I can't even remember it right now. That one is about 50,000 words deep (duh, it began as a NaNoWriMo) and is about a damaged woman in love with her hot hot boss. I know, right? That one has two different first-person POVs which is just so like me.

Under here is a giant pic of me hours after my last birthday, wherein I turned 43. You can totally see how awesome my hair color is. )


Nov. 26th, 2013 04:35 pm
wednes: (Hazel 2)
My birthday party was well attended and a lot of fun. The trifle was a huge success. The queso dip got overcooked in the crock pot and ended up grainy by the end of the night. It was pretty tasty for a while though.

I got some presents:
Rob Zombie lunchbox
glass nail file that is awesome and will never dull
Books from an author I've never read before (Sweet!)
Targaryan coffee mug
Game of Thrones coaster set
blackberry balsamic vinegar
truffle oil
meyer lemon infused olive oil
lemon cookies
lemon square mix
lemon creme coated almonds (OMG so yummy!)
Criterion ed of Fritz Lang's M
Halloween H2O
IHOP gift card
Cornucopia of flowers
Fountain pen with extra ink
kindle books including How to write a novel with Scrivener, We Need to Talk about Kevin, and Murder as Fine Art

There were pics, but I have no time to edit, size and post them until I finish this giant pile of SEO and put out the December issue of Under the Bed.


Nov. 16th, 2013 10:36 pm
wednes: (Grimey)
I'm getting much closer to figuring out the epub and mobi conversions for my beautiful magazine layouts. Turns out, I just have to make 2 different versions of each issue so the epub and mobi will look as awesome (though different) than the pdf. It would be nice if pdfs were easier to read on Kindles and stuff. Personally, I find them difficult to read on mine. The letters are so tiny.

"I'll be fine. Besides, if I get raped it'll be my fault for what I'm wearing." Mark Wahlberg as John Bennet in 'Ted'
Ted is a hilarious movie. I enjoy it more every time I watch.

I have lost my baking mojo. The last few things I made from scratch have not turned out. I tried to make another batch of butterscotch blondies and they tasted ghastlier than a thousand ghouls. I literally threw away an entire pan of brownies. They were seriously inedible.
For the party, I'm using box mixes until I can figure out how to get my baking mojo back.

Oh yeah, my annual party is this coming Saturday--November 23rd.
I'm hoping that people just aren't RSVPing, because very few people have and I'm never prepared for the possibility that people don't enjoy my company.
I'm awesome, right? RIGHT?!?
Anyway, I invited the usual ton of people. It's open-house style, so peeps will most likely be wandering in and out from 6pm until 2am or so.
I'm making a chocolate hazelnut cheesecake trifle, and a big thing of queso dip. Plus I imagine people will bring a few things.

Finished MaddAddam, which is the 3rd in a trilogy by the great Margaret Atwood. God damn, that chick is brilliant. Such elegant writing, it's almost unworthy of some of the characters. Fuck those Painballers, seriously. It didn't end as tragically as I expected, but after reading GRRM, if a single person lives or doesn't get tortured, it seems happy and/or hopeful.

I decided today that if I could be anyone else for one day, I would be Queen Latifah. Because, duh.

WayWard Manor has been pushed back until March 2014 because they just got a whole bunch more of money. I'm stoked to give it a whirl. H says he's gonna play it with me.
wednes: (Under the Bed)
Hey kids, the November issue of Under the Bed is available now in all formats. So that's awesome.
Only $3.99 per issue


Subscribe to save some dough. Only $1.99 per issue, or $19.99 for the whole year. AND you can try us out for FREE for two weeks. Neat, eh?

Tech-wise, I'm still having a rough time with the mag. Converting my beautiful layouts to epub and mobi files is sucking my life dry. Gotta work on that this weekend when I'm done writing boring SEO and fascinating Kinkly stories.

I'm pretty pleased with my new Website. It's pretty nice and lets me show off more stuff. Stig & The Puppetman are slowly going up there, the podcasts are all there too, and the mag, and all my books, and links to everything else I'm up to. So that's cool. There's also gonna be a newsletter, once people sign up.

Holy Crap! I just saw that Anthony Wiener is being on Bill Maher tonight. That's crazy. Who gives a crap what that guy has to say anymore? Um, Wiener, I mean. Maher is also kind of a jerk though.

I downloaded The Conjuring so I can finally check that out. H is also done watching Fringe so we're gonna start buying eps of Torchwood--like I wanted to forever ago.
Comedy-wise, I'll be caught up with Community by the time it comes back in January. Only 13 eps in the next season. That's not nearly enough, because this show is hilarious and clever and I'm bummed I waited so long to watch. Abed and I should have been friends since years ago. Plus, how awesome is it that Chevy Chase plays an out-of-touch asshole? Classic.

I hate spending more than $10 for a Kindle book, but I did pay $12 for MaddAddam. See, I adore Margaret Atwood and this is the third in a trilogy. So far, awesome. I can't even get my head around how she makes the fantastic feel immediate and earthy, while taking vile characters and terrifying events and making them seem like they're being read to you in a flowery garden. I wish I knew what she was like in RL. I suspect if I had insight like that it would totally break my brain.
wednes: (Wednes Logo)
My website is revamped.
I think it's nice.


In other news, I'm beyond stressed at how hard it is to convert my beautiful magazine layouts to epubs and mobi. Apparently, Adobe thinks a Page Break command would make exporting far too easy.
Hell, I'd pay their stupid monthly fee if it meant I could just tell it where to break the page by drawing a line with the stupid arrow.



Oct. 25th, 2013 10:36 pm
wednes: (Wednes Logo)
I am told that my new website will be Up and Atom on Saturday, which is tomorrow. It's a Wordpress site, which is the same kind of site roughly 3/4 of the writers I know have. Except this one will be about good ol' me.
You'll be able to find it the same place as ever:

In addition to hyping the books, it will feature the old podcast eps, the comics I did for Resilient Brainforest, and the various mags and anthologies I may be found in. Then it will talk about the mag, the audiobooks, and all that there.

I'm starting a newsgroup where I'll send out a weekly (or so, I've not decided yet) bulletin rounding up all the places I've been online that week. So it will include my Kinkly articles and GeekBinge stuff, as well as anyplace I've been interviewed or featured. If I do anything else for ZZN, I'll include that as well.
So it'll be crazy comprehensive and informative for anyone with an interest in me and what I've been up to.

NaNoWriMo starts soon. I've carved out some time so I can work on my SyFy script, which I'm pretty excited about getting done. It might also be fun to see how badly it can be fucked up by a terrible director and some godawful acting. I really hope I get to find out.

In worse news, I'm still very far away from being able to convert mag issues to epub and mobi formats. Even worse, I'm not exactly sure how much of this is due to my computer being too old to run the current version of Nook. The mobi files so far are just a big jumble of text I can't make heads or tails of.
So dang and fie on all that.
wednes: (Farnsworth/zombie jesus)
I had a dream that Bill Maher got assassinated and HBO invited me to take over the show. They also wanted me to write the new season of True Blood, but I said no because it was too late to save that crapshack. Imagine all the cool people I'd get to meet if I hosted Real Time. It would only be kind of offset by the number of complete and utter asshats I'd have to endure.

My new website should be live by the end of the week. The designer, my 2nd cousin I think he is, is doing a swell job. If our moms are cousins, that makes us second cousins, right? Anyway, it's a wordpress site with a slick new layout. It builds on a lot of the stuff I've been doing since my first site went up around 2009.

Mag issues continue to be awesome, while my skill at InDesign leaves me feeling like I should stick to crayons. I still can't figure out how to export issues to mobi or epub that people will actually be able to read. Fie. Is there a service where I can pay someone to come over and show me? There should be.

H and celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary on Monday. The actual anniv was Saturday, but of course H had to work. I got him a new watch, a bottle of ghost pepper hot sauce, and some sour cherry Turkish delight, because he loves those Narnia books. He got me a new set of wrist braces since my old ones were pretty sad. He also bought us dinner from Banditos, which is now my fave mexican delivery place in town. We liked Burrito Joint but their uncooked rice broke my tooth, so we ain't going back there.
H and I will have been together for 15 years in July--since we lived together for 7 years before we decided to get married in a year. Fuck. That is a long time for someone to put up with my crap. It's kind of unbelievable.

Maverick is out for mac computers. It's also free. Nice!
I desperately need a new computer, so I'm hoping to be able to do that by the end of the year. Wanna help? Subscribing to the mag is a good way to do that, while supporting small authors and artists. Or, you could just send a macbook pro to my place, and I could open it and use it. ;-]
wednes: (Under the Bed)
Did I ever tell you that offering critique on short story submissions can make an editor come across as a know-it-all bitch?

Because nobody told me...until recently.
Bahahahahahaa-- *sigh*

I'm finding this to be a tricky issue to navigate. Someone advised me once that when people submit stories, that they're asking for my input and critique. That seems logical. At the same time, authors might just want their stuff published in our mag. So once I say no, they might not give a crap about my opinion. Anything said after that point might just come across as a boring lecture.

I never give personal feedback of more than 3 sentences--I haven't yet, anyway. I tend to offer feedback if I think the story is missing something really obvious, if the grammar is godawful, or if I really like (or want to) like the story but can't for some reason. Even more problematic is when I have to decline stories from people I actually know. This sucks. In fact, it sucks so bad that I'd almost rather accept everything my buddies send so I don't ever have to explain why I don't want to use it. But that would make me an asshole.

The important thing here is, subscriptions are affordable, and you totally deserve to get yourself one.
And also, this magazine stuff is hard.
It's fun, but it's crazy hard.
wednes: (Count Thumps Edward)
After this mornings unpleasantness, I wallowed in my complainy-pants sadness for a few hours.
Then I took a nap.

When I woke up, I had some loving and supportive voicemails, texts, and Emails from friends and family. That was swell, really.

When I went back over to the Barnes & Noble site, the link was up.

Under the Bed: Volume 2 Number 1, bitches!

Undead October is full of awesome zombie stories, some cool editorials, our fanciful Letters to the Editor page, and some sweet art. You should totally think about buying it. If you need a mobi or a pdf, you will be able to get that from our website.
wednes: (Zombie Film)
It's the moooost wonderful tiiiiime, of the yeeeeaaarr!

Once again, I don't actually have any Halloween plans.
I'm still too busy with the mag, reviews, Kinkly, and SEO clients to plan anything major.

Speaking of which...
What has become the Undead October issue is coming out in a few days. I'm still pretty bummed about skipping a month, but if what I am told is correct--it will allow us to have a predictable issue release schedule from now on.

The November issue is already in the can, and not surprisingly, looks like it should have been the October issue. Still looking for someone who can draw me a badass Krampus for the December issue.

And finally, I'm doing the NaNoWriMo this year, though instead of a novel, I'm gonna write my SyFy script. That thing is gonna be hilarious, and I'm stoked. That's why I'm doing the mag issues a month ahead of time, so I can skip November and still be on schedule. Might as well, since we were late releasing.
Still wrestling with ID CS6. It feels like being trapped under a wet blanket, I can eventually work it out but it's frustrating as hell. My brain just doesn't think like that. Even though the principles are the same as Illustrator, it's harder when it's a bunch of pages.

My new website is supposed to be done soon.
That will be nice.


Sep. 23rd, 2013 06:16 pm
wednes: (TV!!!)
Even if you've never seen an ep of Dexter in your life, you've probably heard people bitching about the finale online. See, any show that's been on TV for longer than one season will have haters after the finale--no exception. If I liked the finale, the haters can shut up. If I didn't like it--well, they can have at it. ;-] (I liked LOST and Sopranos, but was furious with BSG, for example)

Despite the formulaic season structure on Dexter, and despite the fact that we went through this season surrounded by pivotal characters we barely knew--I thought the finale was beautiful and tragic. I liked it very much.

That said, Dexter pales in comparison to other things on I don't know what genius at Showtime decided to run the Dexter finale the week before the Breaking Bad finale, but that was a terrible choice. And it didn't just work out that way--it was planned. Dexter was moved ahead over a month from when it normally airs, so I don't get that at all. Speaking of Breaking Bad. Damn...this shit is getting really sad. Maybe crime doesn't pay?

With S1 Under the Dome behind us, I'm starting to review Hostages tonight. I hope I didn't choose wrong, because we watched the Sleepy Hollow premiere last week and it was pretty good. I don't even think GeekBinge is covering that, which is a drag.

Speaking of good, Boardwalk Empire has been kicking ass.

In Under the Bed news, the EiC and I made the choice to skip a month of the mag so we could have a regular release schedule. This is due to some weirdness at B&N and some other crap I didn't really want to worry about. So what was Undead September is now our October issue. November will be full of monsters. For December, I really want to put the Krampus on the cover. I'm hoping someone will come through with a drawing. *eyes you artists*

You can beat the rush on our awesome zombie issue by subscribing before it comes out. Here is where you'd do that. It's only $1.99 a month, or even less for a whole year--$19.99. Every month you get at least five awesome short stories along with features (*ahem* [personal profile] porcelain72), reviews, interviews, and my own snarky commentary. How can you resist, and why would you want to?

We have Wreck-it-Ralph on the DVR.
If H won't watch it with me, I'm going to punch him.
I wish I had a boxing glove. I'm not a very hard puncher.
wednes: (Wednes Blue)
For all the work I've been doing, you'd think I'd have a lot more money.

Right now I'm doing 3 TV reviews a week: Dexter, Boardwalk Empire, and Under the Dome. Two of those shows are ending in the next 3 weeks. Then I'm picking up Hostages and American Horror Story: Coven. My new column for GeekBinge is Friday's Pics. We started with 1980, which was kind of an easy one:

Flash Gordon
The Fog

Yeah, I imagine Seth MacFarlane would have been totally down with that.
And yeah, my GeekBinge archive makes it easy to find all my reviews and snarky commentary.

My Kinkly articles continue to be a lot of fun. I've got a Vampire article coming up for Halloween, and another article planned for next month in addition to the news articles I've been doing.

Things at Under the Bed Magazine are slow going. Barnes & Noble has taken their sweet time in getting us changed over to the new branding. They still haven't released the September issue. This is a drag, since I'm putting really strong issues together. I'm getting sort of good at the editing thing, and think the mag has good art and fun extras. It saddens me that it's taking so long to make it to The People. I am hopeful though, that these issues will work themselves out.

In other news, I'm gonna make a new Bean Bag Frog like the one I had in college. Bean Bag Frogs are good thinking caps as I recall. I found a pattern online. Later I'm going to Joanne Fabrics and Crafts to get all the stuff I need. I could have ordered it all online, but I don't want to buy fabric until I touch it. I need some fabrics and button eyes and ribbon for the tongue. Plus I need pins and a pin cushion. I may get bean bag beans, unless they're expensive. I don't know, is there a reason why I shouldn't use lentils or rice or beans or something?
I hope they have that one that's a tomato inexplicably tied to a strawberry. What the hell is that all about, anyway?
wednes: (Neville)
I am not sure I care for the idea of simultaneous submissions. I can see why they're a convenience to the writer, but now that I'm a big-city editor (Ha!) I'm finding the whole concept to be a pain in the ass. Not sure yet if this means I should ban them entirely (not that people would listen) or stay with the current policy which is Simultaneous Subs are strongly discouraged.

Literary types, do you think the submission numbers would go way down if I insisted on no simultaneous subs?
Is that something I should be insisting on considering that we don't pay pro rates yet?

Not sure how to proceed, but I do know that it's frustrating as hell to accept a story, plan out an issue, and then see the work get withdrawn--especially if I've already edited it.
I'm inclined not to accept any submission from an author who does this. But I'm not sure if that's reasonable, or a sign of petttiness on my part.
(I wasn't going to tell anyone this, but I can be damn petty at times--Ha!)

Little help?

In other news, tomorrow night is Ghost Shark.
If you're in the neighborhood and want to come by, it comes on at 9pm.
I also made chocolate chip bananna bread with pecans.
wednes: (Seriously?)
I haven't posted in almost a week. Goodness! You all must be beside yourselves with worry and curiosity. Truth be told, I haven't been on the internets as much as usual. That whole being called a misogynist by strangers thing soured me on my beloved interwebs for a couple of days. Plus, our internets have been out a few times.
I've also been working on the mag, which is alternately awesome as fuck and frustrating as hell. I'm always a tad bemused when grown-ass adults behave like cliquish junior high schoolers in work situations. Seriously? I mean, Really?!?

Undead September is gonna be a badass issue. Having said that, I don't foresee doing a theme issue again any time soon. I'd much rather keep people guessing while avoiding tropes. Tropes piss me off. The only thing worse than following tropes is deliberately doing the opposite of what the trope would require. Predictability is the death of the scare--and if I ever meet Rob Zombie in person, I just might have to tell him that if he's still in the room when I wake up from swooning.
If I wrote a book about my experiences thus far as an editor, it would be called:
Too Many Commas:
My Love Affair with the Backspace Key

People use too many commas.

John Oliver is done hosting The Daily Show...for now. He slayed it, seriously. That guy is adorable, and it's clear that he is well-respected among his peers. Not only is he smart, clever, and really funny--but as soon as he had any pull in the industry, John Oliver immediately started showcasing other comics on a stand-up show. That's just awesome. I love that the Comedy Central late-night peeps seem like genuinely good people who aren't full of shit. We don't hear about them cheating on their wives, driving drunk or otherwise acting like assholes. As sad as it is that this is considered remarkable, I'm glad to know that there are media types who aren't scumbags--not even a little.

Here's a video about how HBO should show more dick that's not of the HODOR variety. Muchas Lulz.
wednes: (TV!!!) Why I hate Skyler White article has driven people to the point of madness. I totally got flamed, and I'm pretty sure a few of them were not sock puppets of the main detractor. One person took my thoughts totally personally, and would not let up about what a terrible misogynist I am, how I don't understand emotional abuse, and apparently think *every* battered woman has the ability to just pick up and leave (and not just Skyler, who has an education, support system, and a pallet heaped with cash).
Presumptions about strangers on the internet are amazing.
I find it especially funny because I pretty much put all my personal business right out there for the reading. Anyone who actually cared to get to know me could do so in short order--just by reading what's already posted.

But see...people aren't interested in getting to know you, especially when they're so busy judging you for daring to say something they don't like. I'm surprised they aren't telling my editor to fire me, lest they boycott the site. Ha!
It's funny mainly because we don't get all that much traffic, so the flaming was a big boost to me money-wise.
I later learned that apparently Vince Gilligan said this:
And with the risk of painting with too broad a brush, I think the people who have these issues with the wives being too bitchy on Breaking Bad are misogynists, plain and simple.
Which, I guess, gives douchebags the idea that by calling me a misogynist that they will become Vince Gilligan's best friend or something.

It seems like my editor took it much more personally than I did, because he really tried to defend me and the article--going so far as to write his own rebuttal article. His main point was that while he disagreed with my take on her, that calling me a misogynist is fucking stupid.

To my mind, saying that *I'm* what represents misogyny is an enormous misunderstanding of what feminism and misogyny actually are. That's over and above the fact that I'm about as misogynistic as I am racist, Christian, or homophobic...which is to say, not fucking much by half. You might as well say everyone who likes the show is a fan of both murder and blue meth.

Last night was movie night. We had a small but quality crowd, good food (Curt brought an amazing buffalo chicken dip that I want to bathe in) and a Burgess Meredith double feature. Foul Play followed by The Sentinel. Nice! There is polenta left over that I'll fry up for H, and a goodly amount of pina colada no-bake dealies that have no booze and are delicious.

Tonight is editing stories for the magazine, and maybe watching Savages. Tomorrow, of course, is a million TV shows. Dexter, Breaking Bad, and Newsroom. Woot!


Aug. 7th, 2013 01:48 am
wednes: (Count Thumps Edward)
Hey all,

I am told that server issues at are being worked on.
The august issue should be up at the site within a day or so, as well as at Barnes & Noble.

I'm really glad that subscribers and new readers alike are so excited to get their hands on the issue. I'm stoked for you to see it too.

Now for the love of all that is holy, stop sending me mean Emails!

Your Fearless Editor,

wednes: (Wizard or the Skull)
Or is it?

I'm incredibly busy for someone who barely leaves the house. Still doing all my usual SEO work. I have about a dozen SEO clients right now. I also write an article or two a month for Kinkly. Those articles tend to go bonkers online. I guess people on the internet like sex. Who knew?

Still reviewing Dexter (meh, so far) and Under the Goddamn Goddamn Dome or whatever it's called. I might as well make the title longer since they've got the nerve to give us a whole second season of that watered down claptrap. H hasn't read the book and he still says it's flat and absurd, and the dialog is clunky and most of the performances are stiff. Dean Norris is giving a stellar performance though. The totality of my snarky comments may be found at Geekbinge.
We're doing some Breaking Bad stuff to celebrate the new season. I'm doing an In Memoriam article with snarky commentary on everyone who died, and a short piece on why Skyler is the worst wife in the history of anything. Well, it's supposed to be a short piece. But she's awful, so it might get long and a little ranty. I'm caught up with the first half of Season Five, and am pretty stoked that they brought in Justin Louis. I love him! I was sad when he turned into a zombie that time.

And of course...the mag is going on. My experiences with theme issues thusfar has led me to conclude that there will be no more theme issues. I'd like to leave each issue as a grab bag where you never know what you'll get. We'll feature things in a way that has universal appeal among horror fans. Undead September is happening, and we've got some cool vampire stuff in the mix for October. Remember, vampires are villains, not fuck buddies.
Horror is a vast landscape and I don't want issues to be restricted to any one thing in particular. Submissions are slow at the moment. I'm hoping that once issues get out there and people see how badass the mag is, that will change. In the mean time, you might consider subscribing so as to get your hands on the horror. It's a mere $1.99 a month or $19.99 for a whole year. I'm not even sure how you could resist. You can't, can you? Besides, how will you review it if you haven't read it?

And finally, IT'S SHARK WEEK!!!
Granted, I liked Shark Week better when it was about shark conservation and the importance of not hunting apex predators to extinction. Now it's about how scary and bitey sharks are, and how high they can jump. I gotta confess, some of that leaping white shark photography is fucking awesome.
I mean, seriously.
wednes: (Wednes Logo)
Checked out The Orphanage today after buying it a long while ago. Damn, it was amazing. Beautifully shot, great cast, and plenty of surprises. It was creepy throughout, damn scary in parts, and had a motherfucking gut punch I in no way saw coming.
So yeah, bravo once again, Guillermo Del Toro.

Speaking of movies, the remake of Maniac was fucking incredible. Exactly what it needed to be, plus Elijah Wood. Very strong camera work, excellent stylized kill scenes, and just the right amount of camp. I did think that Elijah Wood could pull off a serial killer, so it wasn't a total surprise. I was very pleased with how well he developed such a dark character, and how much humanity he was able to bring to something SO melodramatic and textbook.

The first mag issue is coming out on August 4th. I daresay it looks more like an anthology with pictures than an actual magazine at this point. It's a great read though, with some fun stories and cool extras. The subscription link isn't quite ready yet because there's an error and I can't find where to fix it.

Horror fans take note: I'm looking to bring in some more curators to read, comment, and vote on submissions. It's pretty fun--so much fun that we don't actually pay people to do it. But you'll get to read tons of free fiction as well as getting your name in the mag.

And finally, Taco Bell's smothered burritos are pretty good. They are spicier than I expected, very filling, and tasty.
wednes: (Under the Bed)
It's coming right along. It would be finished now but I'm still waiting to get interview questions back from one of the artists. Laying it out has been a huge task, but I think I'm getting the hang of the program now. InDesign is actually a lot like Illustrator with multiple pages. So all those Stig & The Puppetman comics actually did more than display my inadequate drawing skills.

I was gonna avoid using Creative Commons art like old ads and stuff. But I decided to go for it, at least until we can afford to pay artists. The cover art turned out really nice. See:
Art by Michael Larson

The logo is vectored, but in this jpg it doesn't look like it.

I'm waiting for my new bundle of assignments for SEO work. They are late. I was thinking I'd go ahead and get started. Then I weighed that against how mad I'd be if I spend a whole day doing them and then didn't get paid because the client cancelled or wanted to wait or something. So I'm working on some other stuff instead. I need to figure out a schedule where I can get all my stuff done and still have time for my own fiction.
That's right...I still write fiction.

My computer situation is getting dire. In addition to it being really slow and the click bar not working (actually, I had to turn it off so it would stop clicking automatically), and it shutting down randomly, the battery is going as well.
I guess I'm gonna have to break down and buy a mac mini, but not until September since I'm presuming new models will come out to go along with Maverick.


Jul. 18th, 2013 05:21 am
wednes: (Really?)
The weirdest thing has been happening lately.
People come over, or call me and ask how it's going.
And I...inexplicably...have been saying things like:

"Good!" and "Alright, man. How are you?"

If you know me in real life, you'll know that my typical response to a polite inquiry like How are you is a long sigh and a bevvy of complaining. Not lately though. Lately, I've been in good spirits.

Some of this may be that I've stayed in the air-conditioning while the rest of the planet appears to be burning to a crisp out there.
It may also be that I have almost no obligations that need to be met at any specific time of the day or night.
But mostly, I think it's because the magazine is such enormous fun. I'm spending a ton of time on it, and I barely notice because it's such a rockin' good time. My ideas are good, I have many of the tools I need to carry them out--and the rest? Well, there's this thing called The Internets, where any and all needs can eventually be met.
wednes: (Default)
Do you enjoy ticky boxes and telling me things?
If'll totally want to get in on this poll.

What? You can't see it? That must be because Dreamwidth doesn't offer polls even though they cost the same as that other sucky site I used to pay.
So you'll have to go over there to take the poll."

Why would you want to take a poll?
Great Question.
I'm trying to decide on a tagline for Under the Bed and need to know which of my ideas is the least sucky. I value most of your opinions. The rest, I'll probably chuckle at--but you're tough, you'll get over it.

Thanks, all!
wednes: (Growlers)
We are a few short days away from...

The first issue of Under the Bed
(formerly eHorror magazine)

Yeah, that's right. Some foolish fool has given me total control over my very own Horror Fiction Magazine. Can you even believe it?
*rubs hands together in sinister fashion*
I gave it a new name, it's getting a new logo, and the first issue will be out even sooner than I was ready for. Lucky for you, I do some of my best work when I'm scrambling around like a maniac.

There are some damn fine stories to be had in this issue, featuring some truly sick individuals. Of course if you don't like hearing about blood, naked people, or naughty language and stuff, you're probably gonna want to steer clear.
wednes: (OMG!!!)
Yeah, power was out for a fraction of today, giving me yet another fine excuse to not get much work done. It's back on now, which is how I'm blogging. Duh. Publishing is closing down today. This was the publishing house that sent me my very first acceptance letter for my very first novel, A Stabbing for Sadie (which was almost named "Tiamata"). That book is in the process of being released as a second edition. In fact, this very weekend I am going through it one more time. I was ambivalent about some tense issues and now I need to fix it. Anyway, publishing with SGP was great in many ways, and helped me learn a lot about publishing, about writing, and marketing, and how it was not very much like I thought it would be at all. I'm pretty happy to be with a new house with new editions, soon to have a new website and my very own horror mag.
I always had a vision of me sitting in a room with some brilliant editor type, discussing all the ways to make it better. That never happened though. Like a lot of things in life, that's something I imagine will happen to other people but never to me.
But then, I tend toward the melancholia.

Speaking of which, the finale of Marc Maron's show is on tonight. I'm a great fan of Maron, but I daresay it's different than the way I'm a fan of say, Jon Stewart or Carlin. I've been watching Jon Stewart since Mtv Spring Break. He's always seemed like a cool older cousin who knows where I can get some pot--and will sit down and talk to me if I'm sad because the older kids were mean to me.
Maron doesn't seem like someone I'd ever hang out with. He seems like the sort of guy like Jerry Seinfeld--who is way to self-conscious to enjoy hanging out with someone like me. I had a hot, hot boss like that once.

My hair is well on the way to awesome, color-wise. I bleached the hell out of it, becoming half a blonde after about 2 hour of Flash Lightening. I'm doing it up with a new blue and a lilac--which is not taking very well. I'm hoping this second round of color will absorb better and end up looking stunning. The trim I gave my own hair looks kinda shitty, but I'm not cutting any more until it grows out a little in the front.

First issue of my horror magazine is due July 4th. That means I'll have to accept all the stories by then, and notify the authors. I also have to finish Sadie edits in that time, write 8 new SEO articles, finish the last Stig & The Puppetman for a while, and do two TV interviews a week. Dexter starts back up on Sunday. That is, if you'll pardon the sexist expression, gonna be tits!

September 2017



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